I hope my poem cover both bases.
Some background to help it make sense:
- I started putting a small bird feeder out in April, following a late snowstorm.
- I bought a second feeder in May, which I filled with the caviar of bird seed--Favourite Finch seed, at a scary price per bag, because I wanted to attract the tiny, cute birdies.
- Within two weeks I was filling that feeder every day, and by noon it was empty. For a few days, I filled it twice a day. Please note that a bag of Favourite Finch seed contains enough seed for only three and a half refills.
- Finally, I sat down and added up the cost of the seed, the fact that several pushy blackbirds/grackles were getting the lion's share of it, the finches were nowhere to be seen, a couple of pigeons had joined the eight (yes, eight) doves in the back yard to eat up the seed that spilled out when the blackbirds/grackles ate in their very messy way, plus the fact that we are not made of money, nor do we have a money tree in our back yard ...and came up with an indisputable fact: I had to stop. Either stop feeding them altogether, stop putting increasing amounts of seed out, or stop using the expensive seed.
- I bought a large bag of mixed seed which was much cheaper, and started cutting back the amount I put out each day. I am now down to one-third cup of mixed seed daily, sprinkled on the back yard because the only birds that still hang around are the doves and pigeons. And the occasional sparrow.
- Within another week, the free buffet will have gradually been pared back to zero. The remaining birds probably will, too.
And now my poem, drawn from the crucible of hard, hard experience in the bird-feeding department ...
It's A Slippery Slope, All Right, And I Have Hit Bottom
It starts with: Aw, birdies!! So cute and so sweet!
So hungry, you poor things! Here's something to eat!
And then it's: My, my, little birds, so voracious!
I'll buy a new feeder that's much more capacious!
Progresses to: Dang it, we need more bird feed ...
Didn't we just buy some? And yet we still need ...
And now it's: Okay, birds, the free ride is over!
The living's been great; you've all been "in clover";
But birdies, my wallet--it's flat as a pancake;
This restaurant is closed, though it makes my poor heart ache.
It's summer, dear birdies; there's food everywhere.
You'll get along fine if the feeder's not there.
I'll miss your sweet faces and quick little feets,
Your beady black eyes and your stabbity beaks.
Have a good summer, and raise up your young,
And come back to visit when autumn has sprung.
Whew! Rhyming is hard work!
Have a good week, folks. Or at least don't hit bottom :)
On behalf of my feathered brethren, I would just like to say that we are not amused.
(Photo courtesy of Pixabay)