It's hard to believe that it's been two and a half months since I last posted. Life seems to go faster every week, like a runaway train with no one at the controls.
The job I was filling temporarily at work has been filled with a very capable person, so I am finally back to my regular work. I have committed to half-days on a permanent basis, and I am able to do those during the daytime until at least the end of the year. After that, we get into busy season and all offices are filled with other temporary workers. As I said before, being around other people has helped my mood a great deal, so I'm hoping we can work out a way for me to continue on days at that point, even if it means I work in the kitchen or share an office with someone else! I don't want to go back to evenings, working all alone.
Before that, I will be having surgery, probably in October. It is preventive surgery - complete removal of all baby-making equipment - and I'm thankful to have it. I had a surgical procedure in May which showed some pre-cancerous cells, so I hope this takes care of the issue.
I've also had bloodwork and some other medical tests due to fatigue, shortness of breath, and edema in my lower legs. After my husband's death I switched to a very low-meat diet. I was careful about protein intake but didn't realize I wasn't getting enough iron and Vitamin B12, so I'm taking some supplements on my doctor's advice and trying to eat a better diet. I am currently waiting for results of an echocardiogram and have a pulmonary function test coming up next week to see if my asthma is objectively worse. It hasn't felt worse until the last few weeks (which I assumed was either small amounts of wildfire smoke or autumn allergens) but it will be interesting to compare my results to the last time I had one.
While work is a distraction from the sadness and loneliness in my life, they hit me again when I go home every day. I've thought about adopting a cat, but I wouldn't do it until after my surgery because I have to stay in the hospital for a few days afterward. I do try to socialize as much as possible through my craft group, support groups for Alzheimers and caregivers, phone calls and occasional lunches out, but evenings, weekends and holidays are difficult.
My mother continues to be quite unhappy at the nursing home. And I continue to feel guilty and sorry for her. When I visit, her conversation is constantly about "going home" and it is impossible to distract her for more than a minute or two at a time. My brother and I are her guardians and we have reluctantly come to the conclusion that moving her, even if it's a better facility in some ways, would be hard on her at this point, as she is used to the staff and the layout of the facility now. And the question remains if she would even be any happier after the upheaval. So now I am focusing on how to enrich her life at her current facility. I would like to hire someone to "visit" her on a regular basis, but hardly know where to start. The hired aides I have seen, although admittedly I haven't seen many, don't seem to be what I'm looking for. And I dread the time and energy the hiring and vetting will take. But I need to get started.
It's almost fall here. The days are shorter and the nights are colder. We are nearly through hurricane season with no storms, thankfully. There is a major wildfire in western Nova Scotia that has been burning for one month. It is in a mostly wooded area - although 1000 people were displaced for a few weeks - and is now under control, but the province experienced a record drought this summer that contributed to its spread, and we are all hoping for some steady rains this fall to help extinguish it and fill wells, lakes and rivers across the province.
I've been collecting memes but not publishing them, so I have a backlog. That's not a bad thing, but I'm itching to share them. Let's have a look, shall we?
It's a cat theme today.
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