We are in the midst of another snowstorm here. The snow is wet and heavy, as the temperature is just around 0C. The forecast is calling for 15-25 cm before evening.
I have already shovelled my lane twice, once before the 9 a.m. trip to my mother's for her eye drops, and once after I came back. It's piling up quickly.
Here's a lone crocus beside my front step. The poor thing popped up this spring in a bare patch of earth I dug up last year, intending to plant annuals but not following through. I wanted to take the photo before the deer decapitated it.
See the nice bare ground?
It's not bare anymore.
Here's a video I just took out my front door.
And here's one from my back door, showing the accumulation of snow on the deck railing in just a few hours.
For those who prefer photos rather than videos, this is for you.
I am taking the day off medical duty for my mother. I have left the eye drops and her medication for tonight and tomorrow morning with her, along with written instructions.
She has already called me to question the instructions. She feels the eye drops should go in the eye with less vision, not the operated eye. We have talked about this many times. She only remembers having the eye surgery when reminded, because "it was so long ago" (twenty days, but who's counting?).
I asked if she wanted to come stay with me until the storm was over, but she said she would be okay. And I am too worn out to push the suggestion. The snow is forecast to stop this evening, and the streets should be plowed by morning, so whatever damage she can do with the eye drops and medications will only last one day.
I was scheduled for a physio appointment today to try to figure out a knee problem that has been creeping up on me for well over a year now. Because of the snow, I have re-scheduled for later in the week. I fear losing my mobility because there is only me, myself, and I to depend on now.
So I have a rare day with nowhere I have to go and no deadlines to meet, except to call my mother to remind her of the time to take her eye drops.
I wish I could shut off the worry in my brain.
When my dad was in the last years of his life in a nursing home, I found I needed to be there almost daily to keep an eye on his care. I also enjoyed his company and he had few visitors so I liked to drop in every day. As his health worsened, I learned to put my worry in a box, mentally, because I knew that he was at least safe in the home. It was hard, but I learned to relax for the time I wasn't with him.
I can't seem to relax about my mother. I think the difference is that there is nobody there with her. I know her neighbours keep an eye on her, but it's different than having someone right in her home.
But she will not agree to anyone being in her home (except me, or my brother who lives a six hour round trip away). Home care is available but only if she will sign up for it, which she adamantly refuses to do. She is considered competent to make that decision until such time as a doctor can declare her incompetent. She has no doctor to do so. It seems to be an impossible problem to solve until she gets to such a stage of deterioration that she ends up in hospital, either from a fall, from malnutritioin, or from an illness of some kind.
I almost forgot - I have a story for you about snow in Nova Scotia. The month was May and the year was 1957. My mother was just about due to give birth to her second child. That would be me. She realized she was in labour in the evening on May 2. It was snowing heavily and the hospital was fifteen miles away. They had to drive very slowly and were worried about getting there safely. I was born the next morning.
By the time she (and I) returned home a few days later, the snow was gone and it was so warm my four-year-old brother was wearing short pants. (Trousers, for those in the UK.)
My mother told me this story often. Until last year. Last year she forgot my birthday until two months after it happened. This year she no longer remembers my birth date or my age.
That's okay. She can't remember her own, either.
Surely some funnies are in order after that sad, soppy tale :)
I found this series of "embarrassing moments" in a YouTube video. By the time I got to the end I was crying with laughter.
I hope you enjoyed them as much as I did. And I hope the inside of your head is tidier and less chaotic than the inside of mine :)